Sunday, January 3, 2010

One day at a Time

Just to kind of give you an update of what's going on with me lately, I've been thinking more and more about this living one day at a time thing. Some use the phrase living in the moment. Some say being present.

Anyway, in some of my other blogs I've mentioned that I am learning to live one day at a time or day by day.

Here's the thing, it's sometimes hard to get my mind around it, to know if I am truly living that way. I will be going along enjoying the day or dealing with what I need to do for today, but then an issue comes up about something later in the week and I'm like, "is it okay to think about that today or do we need to wait and discuss that later."

I'm telling you, if you didn't realize it already, I am kind of on the "weird side." I think some really crazy thoughts sometimes. I mean, is there really anyone else out there that thinks about these things and analyzes these things like I do???

Let me give you a recent example. This Wed, Jan. 6, we go back for Bobby's second chemo. treatment. He has been feeling pretty well the last week or so and really well today. We got to talking about the first chemo. cycle and how this second one will probably be similar or the same. We talked about what happened on each day of the first chemo. cycle and the way he felt each day, the different side effects he experienced, his appetite, etc.

Okay, here's the thing..... If I'm talking about all that stuff now before it happens, Is that living in the moment, is that living one day at a time? That's what I'm dealing with lately.

I realize you have to talk about things that are going to happen tomorrow. I cannot just NEVER discuss the next day's activities or plan for a trip or plan for something?

Bobby was saying how we should leave a little early on Wed. on the way to chemo. and eat at Cracker Barrel (who doesn't like Cracker Barrel) because he will be feeling good on the way up to his treatment and he is probably thinking ahead of the days food will not taste as good to him. We were discussing what time to leave and still get to the doctor on time.

During the conversation about Cracker Barrel I'm thinking, "am I living one day at a time?"

I know that in scripture Jesus talked about things that would happen in the future. There were lots of times that Christ made mention of future events and things that would take place and things He would do on another day. I don't think He says not to think or discuss the future, just not to be anxious or worry or fret or bite my nails, or not trust Him, or get so hung up on tomorrow that today I am MISERABLE. God doesn't want me in a big bundle of worry and fretting today about something tomorrow that may never happen. I think as I have been writing this, I kind of got my answer.

Well, like I said, I'm learning. They say when you stop learning, you might as well stop living. I don't know who "they" is, but that's what "they" say.

I don't know about you, but I don't want to stop learning. I don't want to stop living. I want to continue on this journey and learn as much as I can NOW, TODAY, IN THIS MOMENT DAY BY DAY, ONE DAY AT A TIME.

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